Test de personnalité amoureuse - Est-ce que vous pesez dans le game ?

[---]

http://www.okcupid.com/the-dating-persona-test

Perso j'ai eu le Last Man On Earth, le pire truc quoi.

Faut pas le prendre à la lettre comme le MBTI (qui n'est déjà pas l'évangile) vu que c'est à vertu comico-humiliante mais c'est rigolo.

[1984]

The Sudden Departure

Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Sweet. Dear. Loving. At Gate 18. Final call. You are The Sudden Departure.

You’ve been in a lot of serious relationships. More than a few have ended ugly. Uglily. Whatever. Our guess is that you’re a really fantastic girl who doesn’t really know what she wants, and you’ve broken a few hearts as a result. You fall for people easily, and you enjoy the feeling of falling in love, but once you’re there, either boredom or the old “grass is greener” syndrome sets in. The mind wanders, and with it goes the flesh. And then the toiletries.

We know you’re not the classic “love ’em and leave ’em” type, at least not in a purely sexual sense. You have too many serious bonding tendencies for that. But even though you’re theoretically looking to settle down, you don’t settle long on one person. “Serial monogamist” is probably something you hear a lot. “Emotionally loose” is another way to put it. To the poor guys eating your dust and sniffing your panties, it doesn’t really make much difference. Of course, it’s not really your fault that people get hurt. You have every right to move on when you choose.

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Y a du vrai.

[Koala]

The Peach Random Gentle Love Master (RGLM)

Playful, kind, and well-loved, you are The Peach.

For such a warm-hearted, generous person, you’re surprisingly experienced in both love and sex. We credit your spontaneous side; you tend to live in the moment, and you don’t get bogged down by inhibitions like most women your age. If you see something wonderful, you confidently embrace it.

You are a fun flirt and an instant sweetheart, but our guess is you’re becoming more selective about long-term love. It’s getting tougher for you to become permanently attached; and a guy who’s in a different place emotionally might misunderstand your early enthusiasm. You can wreck someone simply by enjoying him.

Your ideal mate is adventurous and giving, like you. But not overly intense.

[AmBITCHious]

The Playstation

Random Gentle Sex Master (RGSM)

Easy to turn on. Hard to beat. You are The Playstation.

You’re a nice girl, and you have lots of sex. It’s therefore highly likely that you’re attractive, and you’re certainly outgoing & friendly. Plus, this healthy physical attitude of yours indicates deeper emotional well-being and stability. Unheard of. When guys dare to dream, they dream of you.

You don’t get attached too easily, and, to wit, you’re not necessarily looking for something long-term right now. That’s a bigger asset than you know. Though, physically speaking, you’re open to anything, you’re keeping your emotional side well-protected. This means there won’t be a lot of wreckage to clean up whenever you decide to settle down.

In the meantime, the men you share yourself with actually respect you. Like them, you enjoy sex for its own sake and don’t need any other validation for pleasure than pleasure itself. Hopefully, you have the good sense to blow off anyone who thinks less of you for that. Usually, this is the part of the description where we offer some life-correcting advice, but honestly, we can’t think of anything about you we’d change. Keep on fucking, partner.

[Иди и смотри]

Rigolo/deconcertant...

The Boy Next Door Random Gentle Love Dreamer (RGLD)

Kind, yearning, playful, you are The Boy Next Door. You’re looking for real Love, a lot like girls do. It might not be manly, but it’s sweet.

We think the next three years will be very exciting and fruitful ones for you. Your spontaneous, creative side makes you a charming date, and we think you have a horny side just waiting to shine. Or glisten, rather. You enter new relationships unusually hopeful, and the first moments are especially glorious. If you’ve had some things not work out before, so what.

On paper, most girls would name the Boy Next Door as their ideal mate. In the real world, however, you’re often passed over for more dangerous or masculine men. You’re the typical “nice guy:” without just a touch of cockiness, you’re doomed with girls. A shoulder to cry on? Okay, sure. But never a penis to hold.

More than any other type, Boys Next Door evolve as they get older. As we said, many find true love, but some fail miserably in the search. These tarnished few grow up to be The Men Next Door, who are creepy as hell, offering back rubs to kids and what not.

Beurk.

[Orphelin du crazy]

Même chose que Foulam

[---]

Boy next door, c'est le profil le moins pourrave à mon avis.

C'est le mec qui tire 11 nanas dans sa vie et qui se marie avec la onzième à 30 piges, lui fait 2 gosses, divorce à 50, se remarie avec une plus jeune et se fait respecter par ses gamins parce qu'ils s'intéresse encore à eux et à leurs passions à un âge avancé.

C'est celui qui s'en sort le mieux à la fois sentimentalement et économiquement, d'un point de vue évolutionniste : c'est le boy next door sur lequel s'appuie toutes les civilisations avancées. Il est au fondement de la Culture de la Honte et de la Culpabilité : c'est leur liant commun.

Nicolas Sarkozy est un boy next door

En gros c'est Ethan Mars dans Heavy Rain.

Avant la mort de Shaun bien entendu.

[Fred Yankee]

Clean. Smooth. Successful. You’re The Playboy.

You’re spontaneous, and your energy is highly contagious. Guys therefore find you fun to be around, and girls find you compelling. You have lots of sex, and you manage it all without seeming cheap or being hurtful. Well done. You probably know karate, too.

It’s obvious to us, and probably everyone else, that you’re after physical rather than emotional relationships, but you’re straight up with potential partners. And if a girl you want isn’t into something casual, it’s no big deal. You move on. BEFORE sleeping with her. Usually. At least you try to. Such control is rare.

If you’re feeling unfulfilled, maybe you should raise your standards. New conquests will only be satisfying if there’s a possibility of rejection

Crisse c'est de la marde.

[Ecce Homo]

http://www.okcupid.com/personality?type=DGLM&g=0&o=2

Deliberate gentle love master.

[billybob89]

Comme foulard!

[Commissaire Laviolette]

The Poolboy Random Gentle Sex Dreamer (RGSD)

Friendly and eager. You are The Pool Boy.

A teen at heart, you anxiously move about your daily tasks, hoping, praying for a good, instant lay. You’re carefree, enthusiastic, and rarely discouraged. Love is cool, but it’s not for you right now. You know what is? Crotches.

You’re a fun person in both big and small groups, and your friends trust and love you. Inside you, meanwhile, your lust is only growing. Imagine your beating heart sprouting pubic hair. Exactly. Try shaving that.

If you’re not scoring enough—which you aren’t—you should adopt new strategies. Lower your standards. Be aggressive. Pool Boys are often submissive and hope (desperately) sex will find them. Realize that passiveness will not hook the horny girls you desire. A bolder approach and sheer repetition will.

[Ecce Homo]

"Inside you, meanwhile, your lust is only growing. Imagine your beating heart sprouting pubic hair. Exactly. Try shaving that."

hahaha c'est rigolo.

[Aradia]

The Maid of Honor

Deliberate Gentle Love Master (DGLM)

Appreciated for your kindness and envied for all your experience, you are The Maid of Honor.

Charismatic, affectionate, and terrific in relationships, you are what many guys would call a “perfect catch”—and you probably have many admirers, each wishing to capture your long-term love. You’re careful, extra careful, because the last thing you want is to hurt anyone. Especially some poor boy whose only crime was liking you.

We’ve deduced you’re fully capable of a dirty fling, but you do feel that post-coital attachment after hooking up. So, conscientious person that you are, you do your best to reserve physical affection for those you respect...so you can respect yourself.

Your biggest negative is the byproduct of your careful nature: indecision. You’re just as slow rejecting someone as you are accepting them.

[Latourette]

The Playboy Random Gentle Sex Master (RGSM)

Y'a pas de quoi être fier.

[Fred Yankee]

The Playboy Random Gentle Sex Master (RGSM)

Y'a pas de quoi être fier.

Fumer la top et avoir un fucking tattoo de scorpion, c'est crissement dégueulasse.

[Pedrosanchez]

En voilà un nouveau

The Billy Goat

Horny. Stubborn. Kinda cute. Slightly immature. And often found on rough terrain. You are The Billy Goat.

You’re lusty, but typically monogamous, and all in all you’re a pretty good boyfriend. In fact, you enjoy relationships, if mostly for the sex and physical companionship.

You have a certain boyish charm, and you’re eager. Therefore you probably attract girls who are serious about romance. But few who get close to you realize how unready for total commitment you are. People fall for you. Meanwhile, you maintain your emotional distance, and there goes another box of tissues.

You’re perfectly capable of a long-haul relationship, but, right now, dating someone primarily means having a consistent, available, preferably not-too-chatty, hookup. You’re a careful, methodical person, and you work hard at making things work. It’s just that the type of woman most likely to find your strengths endearing is also the most likely type to find your shortcomings heartbreaking. Someone with a similarly laid-back approach to dating would be perfect for you.

Modifié 9 avril 2015 par Pedrosanchez

[Oshino]

The Loverboy

Random Gentle Love Master (RGLM)

Well-liked. Well-established. You are The Loverboy. Loverboys thrive in committed, steady relationships—as opposed to, say, Playboys, who want sex without too much attachment. You’ve had many relationships and nearly all of them have been successful. You’re a nice guy, you know the ropes, and even if you can be a little hasty with decisions, most girls think of you as a total catch. Your hastiness comes off as spontaneity most of the time anyhow, making you especially popular in your circle of friends, too. You know not to make the typical Loverboy mistake of choosing someone who appreciates your good humor and popularity, but who offers nothing in return. You belong with someone outgoing, independent, and creative. Otherwise, you’ll get bored. And then instead of surprising her with flowers or a practical joke, you’ll surprise her by leaving.

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Y'a du vrai, je l'admet. Mais pour la dernière phrase ils sont carrément à coté de la plaque. Je n'ai jamais été aussi radical. (dans quoi que ce soit d’ailleurs)

[Daleko]

Sympa, j'ai eu la demoiselle d'honneur, comme d'autres plus haut, et dans la liste des types à éviter absolument, il y a le résultat de mon mari, "The False Messiah", et ça lui ressemble bougrement.

People believe in you, and then you send them to hell. Behold, the False Messiah.

You’re usually a very kind person, and conscientious, too. Socially, you’re a leader, and your friends and associates look up to you. In intimate relationships, you’re a capable, responsive, and experienced lover. Outside the box, however, you run into trouble.

Girls fall hard for you, but you’re much more ambivalent about them. The beginnings of your relationships are unusually intense, making it all the rougher on her when they end. At first, using all your accumulated tricks of the trade, you ladle on the affection. But once she’s all covered in soup, you withhold the true napkins of commitment. What’s that all about? We should’ve called you the False Waiter.

You’re looking for Love. But history tells us you struggle to settle down and accept it. There’s a deep streak of carnality within you. And while you’ll never be a predator, you’ll always fight the urge to roam free. You like to plan things out, so plan this: find someone who can indulge your selfish side, has a healthy sexual appetite, and doesn’t mind uncertainty

Oh well,au moins si on divorce je serai riche.

[Chicken of the infinite]

Moi et 1984 devrions aller prendre un verre!

The Sudden Departure

Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Sweet. Dear. Loving. At Gate 18. Final call. You are The Sudden Departure.

You’ve been in a lot of serious relationships. More than a few have ended ugly. Uglily. Whatever. Our guess is that you’re a really fantastic girl who doesn’t really know what she wants, and you’ve broken a few hearts as a result. You fall for people easily, and you enjoy the feeling of falling in love, but once you’re there, either boredom or the old “grass is greener” syndrome sets in. The mind wanders, and with it goes the flesh. And then the toiletries.

We know you’re not the classic “love ’em and leave ’em” type, at least not in a purely sexual sense. You have too many serious bonding tendencies for that. But even though you’re theoretically looking to settle down, you don’t settle long on one person. “Serial monogamist” is probably something you hear a lot. “Emotionally loose” is another way to put it. To the poor guys eating your dust and sniffing your panties, it doesn’t really make much difference. Of course, it’s not really your fault that people get hurt. You have every right to move on when you choose.

[Fred Yankee]